Cloud’s Grief
by Raistlinm08
After the death of Aerith at the end of Disk One, some people
claim that Cloud shows no further grief over Aerith’s death, and that this shows
he didn’t love Aerith to the same extent that he loved Tifa. But grief can be
expressed in several ways and is different for each person. Therefore, simply
looking for Cloud to break down and cry in his circumstance is not only unlikely
of his character, but it is not the only indicator of grief. So we need to look
closely at his interactions with others, and even at his silences, to ascertain
whether Cloud did indeed express grief about Aerith after her death.
People
experiencing grief both deal with it and express it in different ways. It is
unique to the individual. During times of grief, some may choose to stay silent
and seem depressed, whereas others will keep themselves constantly occupied with
work, exercise or other responsibilities, which is exactly what Cloud did. Cloud
was constantly occupied with pursuing Sephiroth up Gaea’s Cliff and into the
Northern Crater, obtaining the Huge Materia in Junon and Rocket Town, consulting
Bugenhagen, finding the Key of the Ancients, fighting the Diamond and Ultimate
Weapons, and stopping Hojo in Midgar all the while he was attempting to stop
Meteor.
It has also been shown that people in extreme
situations such as war, or in this case saving the Planet, tend to suppress any
large emotions they are currently feeling, such as grief. The pressure of an
extreme situation can put the effects of grief completely out of mind. This
would explain why Cloud rarely showed outward signs of grief throughout the
latter half of the game. These things show in and of themselves that Cloud is dealing
with his grief.
The effects of grief can also have the effect of changing a person’s ideals and
values. After the death of Aerith, Cloud becomes more actively involved in
dealing with members of the group and wanting to save the Planet, as well as
taking revenge on Sepiroth. Throughout Disk One, Cloud’s primary concern was
revenge on Sephiroth, but his attitude seemed to change to fighting more for his
friends and the planet in Disks Two and Three. Whereas some people interpret
this to be evidence of Cloud finding himself, it can also be seen as an effect that
the death of Aerith had on his very persona, making him realize the
importance of saving the Planet, its inhabitants, and his friends.
However, this isn’t to say that Cloud showed no grief whatsoever. In the latter
parts of the second disk, Cloud starts to reflect on his past with Aerith and
his memories with her. He also shows some signs of hopelessness and depression.
Both of these symptoms are ways of dealing with grief that Cloud expressed in
Final Fantasy VII. For example, Cloud says this after coming back down from
space:
Cloud
“I've... been thinking too. About the universe... planet... ocean. How wide and
big... No matter where I go and what I do it won't change a thing.”
In this statement,
Cloud expresses hopelessness about the situation that he’s in. This is a common
sign of depression that can be brought on by other emotions, such as grief for a
loved one. We see this kind of hopelessness again at the City of the Ancients with Bugenhagen:
Cloud "...This is
the end."
(He looks up, shrugging.)
"Aerith had the White Materia..."
"But when Aerith died, it fell from the altar..."
(He shakes his head sadly.)
"That's why...... this is the end."
Yet
again Cloud is showing hopelessness and depression about the situation at hand.
Earlier on in the game, he wouldn’t have given up on their chances so easily,
but his changed attitude and feelings of depression have caused these slumps
into hopelessness. However, Cloud also showed healthier signs of grief in the
form of remembrance upon his return to the City of the Ancients:
Cloud “But, it
cost her her life... her future..."
"I'm sorry... Aerith. I should have figured this out sooner."
"...You left us without saying a word..."
"It was all so sudden, I couldn't think..."
"That's why it took so long for me to find out."
"But,
Aerith... I understand now. Aerith... I'll do the rest.”
Cloud
is reflecting on his past with Aerith in this scene, which is a healthy form of
dealing with grief. Thus Cloud is dealing with his grief over Aerith’s death.
Cloud also expresses his grief about Aerith’s death in other scenes, like when
they go to visit Bugenhagen in Cosmo Canyon:
(Cloud looks down)
Cloud "I remember Aerith a lot. No... not that. You haven't remembered. You haven't forgotten. That's not it... How would you say it... Aerith was right there all along. Right by our side. She was so close, we couldn't see her. What Aerith did... The words she left behind..."
Cloud says that he’s been remembering Aerith a lot, so it’s obvious that he’s been thinking of her even though he hasn’t expressed it until now. In fact, Cloud speaks fifty-thre lines of remembrance for Aerith over the course of Disks Two and Three, which is fully a third of the amount of lines that he speaks to Tifa over the same period of time.
In addition to how much he speaks of her, Cloud also says that he remembers Aerith a lot when Avalanche goes back to Cosmo Canyon. So it seems that the memory of Aerith is on Cloud’s mind a great deal after her death. (The amount of interaction that Cloud has with both women is fully documented at Comparing Cloud’s Affection for Aerith and Tifa.)
Just before the Last Night Under the Highwind
Scene, Cloud says this to everyone:
Cloud "I think we all are fighting for ourselves."
"For ourselves... and that someone... something... whatever it is, that's important to us."
"That's what we're fighting for."
"That's why we keep up this battle for the planet."
......
Cloud "I know why I'm fighting."
"I'm fighting to save the planet, and that's that."
"But besides that, there's something personal too..."
"A very personal memory that I have."
The reason that Cloud is fighting to save the Planet is “a very personal memory” that he has. This “very personal memory” is someone or something important to Cloud. Is that “very personal memory” more likely to be Aerith or Tifa? After all, Tifa is not a memory… she is standing right there on the bridge of the Highwind as Cloud says this to everyone. Cloud also said in Cosmo Canyon that he remembers Aerith a lot, so she is often present in his memories. It may very well be that Aerith is that “very personal memory” that he’s fighting for.
So there is evidence that Cloud grieved privately for the loss of Aerith and held her in his memory during Disks Two and Three of Final Fantasy VII, as seen in his quiet remembrances, signs of hopelessness and depression, and changes in his attitude and persona. More evidence of Cloud's continuing grief over her death is found in the novellas Maiden of the Planet and Case of Tifa, as well as in the movie Advent Children. The extreme grief and heartbreak that Cloud felt at the time of Aerith's death is clearly portrayed in the following passage of the official novella Maiden of the Planet:
But a cry came through to her.
It wasn't the sound of her cry. If it was then she would have felt the blood
gushing up through her throat and the fury that forced its way out from the
depths of her soul - It was the sound of Cloud's heart cracking. It was the cry
of his heart that could never be healed of the grief he had towards Aerith's
death, the blame towards himself and the hatred he had for Sephiroth.
She was surprised at the great sorrow he had for her. She was a little happy
that he thought so much of her but she also felt the pain that was many times
greater. There was nothing she could do about Cloud's suffering and the pain
ached in her heart.
~Maiden of the
Planet
This passage from the novella vividly describes the heartbreak and grief that Cloud felt, as well as the suffering and pain that ached in his heart at the time Aerith died. The story also plainly states that Cloud's heart would never be healed of the grief he felt at her death. Evidence of Cloud's continuing grief for the loss of Aerith can also be seen in different passages of the novella Case of Tifa, such as when Cloud delivers flowers to Aerith's grave for Elmyra:
During their holiday, Tifa and Marlene were cleaning the room that was now Cloud's office. There were many papers that laid scattered about unsorted. One of them caught Tifa's eye.
Client Name - Elmyra
Gainsborough
Delivery Item - Bouquet
Destination - The Forgotten City
Tifa put the paper away with the others as if nothing happened. But she was trembling severely. Transporting mail around the world meant Cloud was traveling around his past too. She knew that Cloud was in great pain because he couldn't protect Aerith. Cloud was on the verge of overcoming it but now, going back to the place where he and Aerith got separated meant that his sorrow and regret was going to tear his heart apart once again.
It was night and they had closed the bar. Cloud was drinking wine even though he rarely does. He drained his glass. Tifa hesitated before going over and filling his glass.
"Shall I join you?" There was something she wanted to talk to him about.
"I want to drink alone."
Hearing that, Tifa lost control and said, "Then drink in your room." ~Case of Tifa
The pain that Cloud feels when taking flowers to Aerith's grave is clearly seen in this passage, since Cloud withdraws into himself and starts drinking once he returns to the Seventh Heaven. The pain and sorrow that tears at Cloud's heart upon his visit to Aerith's grave is even very obvious to Tifa.
It is never specified how soon Cloud started visiting Aerith's Church after Final Fantasy VII. Since Cloud told no one about his visits to the Church, it's even possible that he started visiting the Church as soon as Avalanche returned back to Midgar/Edge. We do know, however, that he had been visiting the Church for some time before Denzel arrived, and that Cloud eventually moved into Aerith's Church before the start of Advent Children, which can be interpreted to mean that Cloud wants to be close to Aerith's memory. It is also stated in Case of Tifa that when Cloud found Denzel in the Church, he felt that Aerith had brought Denzel to him. All of this serves as evidence that Cloud never forgot about Aerith.
It is only when Cloud has finally been reunited with Aerith at the end of Advent Children that he is finally able to smile. Before he smiles, Aerith tells Cloud that everything will be alright, and Cloud replies:
"I know. I'm not alone... not anymore...."
If Cloud was feeling alone until this time, then someone significant has been missing from his life for the last two years. Since Cloud was able to re-establish a connection with Aerith during Advent Children, the most obvious person missing from his life during the last two years was Aerith. His words clearly imply that Cloud is no longer alone because he has been reunited with her.
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~ Script excerpts were taken from the Final Fantasy VII script at RPGamer